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The Greedy Cow

Mile End

  • Purpose:   Burger assessment

  • Good for:  Mild surprise

  • Verdict:      High end at Mile End. Nice little place, specialising in burgers and nice looking steaks, good range of beer and wine. Great range of toppings and Camel/Kangaroo/Boar options.  Let down by the oven chips.

  • Burger:       Very nice.

  • Cost:           £££

 

       Web:          http://www.greedycow.com/

 

  • Stars:         ****

Brgr.co

Soho

  • Purpose:   Burger assessment

  • Good for:  Cosy dining

  • Verdict:      Ultimately a little disappointing, the menu promises much but fails to deliver - not sure what it was, maybe the small things like Jalpenos being provided in a small pot rather than being in the burger (although some will probably prefer this), or the cooking being medium rare regardless of request. The wife would like to point out that she liked it and thinks I'm being unfair.

  • Burger:       It was OK, felt small (it was 6oz), and not as tasty as I'd hoped.

  • Cost:           £££

 

       Web:          http://www.brgrco.co.uk/

 

  • Stars:        ***

Grill Krayzee

Enfield Town

  • Purpose:     Quick stop

  • Good for:    Quick stops

  • Verdict:       Not gourmand, but plenty of bang for the buck. Reasonable range of diner options - including good selection of burgers. Great range of shakes.

  • Burger:        Not for the connosieur, but does a good job.

  • Cost:            ££

 

       Web:            http://www.grillkrayzee.co.uk/

 

  • Stars:           **

Bar Boulod

Mandarin Oriental, Hyde Park/Kensington

  • Purpose:     Treat

  • Good for:    Spending money

  • Verdict:       It's a proper restaurant with a lot of good looking food and a long wine list - happily the burgers, somewhat a signature dish, are excellent. A range of four isn't a lot - but they are great tasting meat (think steak sandwich) with nice variety. Crisp fries finish the job well. Ketchup in a pot.

  • Burger:        Gourmand.

  • Cost:            ££££

 

       Web:            http://www.barboulud.com/london/

 

  • Stars:           *****

Burger & Shake

Bloomsbury/Kings Cross

  • Purpose:     Burger Assessment

  • Good for:    Jalapeno Poppers

  • Verdict:       Well that's what you get for using a 5 star system - really nice burgers, meat a bit loose but good taste, fries crisp if a teensy greasy, and the best Jalapeno Poppers ever (if more croquette really). So where do you go - 9 out of 10 isn't an option. Well, at least one of the other burgers in the short selection was great, the specials interesting, hot dogs and "hard" shakes (alcohol in them, so not for little Johnny) plus Mean Time and nice service, so why not.

  • Burger:        Home made.

  • Cost:            £££

 

       Web:            http://burgerandshake.co.uk/

 

  • Stars:           *****

Wolfe's Bar & Grill

Holborn

  • Purpose:     Just Passing

  • Good for:    Feeling full

  • Verdict:       It's a vaguely old fashioned grill, as befits a location opposite the Grand Lodge, with a couple of "normal"burgers (if the mashed potatoe side doesn't give it away, beware the Peppercorn doesn't come in a bun!) and a couple of Kobe and Wagyu units. The quality of the normal patty isn't great, neither are the chips, but there's a nice salad, big pots of really nice BBQ sauce & tomato relish, and the 10oz burger is extremely filling.

  • Burger:        Dense.

  • Cost:            ££££

 

       Web:            http://www.wolfes-grill.net/

 

  • Stars:           ***

Dirty Burger

Kentish Town

  • Purpose:     Post Pond Sustenance

  • Good for:    Feeling Trendy

  • Verdict:       Very similar to MEATmarket (sic) in Covent Garden I thought - and I didn't really enjoy it. Fits a brief, "dirty" burgers - bit sloppy, reasonably tasty beef, special sauce, in a downtown metro environment, everything ironically feeling a bit expensive (although to be fair, no more than it's peers).

  • Burger:        Dirty. Probably.

  • Cost:            ££

 

       Web:           http://www.eatdirtyburger.com/

 

  • Stars:           **

The Diner

Covent Garden (ish)

  • Purpose:     Burger Assessment

  • Good for:    Being annoyed

  • Verdict:       If the burgers had as much flava as the sound system, it would have been great - but despite there being a potentially tasty patty in the toasted to dryness bun, not saved by watered down salad, it was dense and overcooked - shame. Skin on fries again. Yee hah. Experience once again almost saved by the booze - a little pricy but this is Shaftesbury Ave.

  • Burger:        Overcooked

  • Cost:            £££

 

       Web:           http://www.goodlifediner.com/

 

  • Stars:           **

Le Brasserie

Epernay, France

  • Purpose:     Champagne Lunch*

  • Good for:    Champagne*

  • Verdict:       Dull. But hey, it's Champagne* central (Epernay, not the Brasserie), so who cares (not my wife anyway, just pointing out it wasn't my idea, and I'm not made of money - although for <20 Euros a bottle, Champagne's not expensive per se)?

  • Burger:        Standard

  • Cost:            £££

 

       Web:           http://www.lecentralepernay.fr/

 

  • Stars:           *

 

           * The eagle eyed will have noticed that I wasn't even drinking Champagne at that point, so who know whY I'm going on about it. Some might say, "pretentious prat", with some justification.....

Un Monde Meilleur

Brussels, Belgium

  • Purpose:     Wetting The Baby's Head

  • Good for:    Stereotypical waiters

  • Verdict:       It had to be home made, as I don't think you can get burger patties that small commercially. I'm sure it would have been nice had I been able to taste it - the burger sauce was pretty tasty, and there was a lot of greenery. Try the Duck Curry, in a bun if you must - plenty of that and it looked great. Belgian beers available (probably) or Californian wine.

  • Burger:        AWOL

  • Cost:            ££

 

       Web:           Not even Google knows

 

  • Stars:           **

The Filling Station

Kings Cross (just about)

  • Purpose:     Cycling Sustenance

  • Good for:    Surprises

  • Verdict:       I wasn't expecting anything when I arrived, so I was surprised to find I enjoyed the burger - had a double as I was sharing. Brioche a little too sweet as usual, but not bad, meat a bit overdone but traces of pink and reasonably tasty. Sides all pretty nice as well, fried pickled chillis very nice. Two beers to choose from, and a wine list. If it wasn't all 25% too expensive, it would have been a good visit (not taking cash might have been a giveaway....)

  • Burger:        Overpriced

  • Cost:            £££

 

       Web:           http://shrimpys.co.uk/

 

  • Stars:           **

All Beef Burger & Co

Worthing, West Sussex

  • Purpose:     Post Wedding Recovery

  • Good for:    Sobering up

  • Verdict:       Just what the doctor probably wouldn't have ordered, except there's no beer available so he'd probably have agreed with that. On the whole, the Cheeseburger wasn't the best option - the bun is too big for the meat, which in turn is quite dense and a bit short in flavour. A big range of alternatives, and if I'd not be basing the reviews on like for like cheeseburgers, it would probably have been better - the Sizzling Hot worked much better.  Nice enough chips, reasonable prices, and did I mention no beer?

  • Burger:        Dry, like the alcohol policy.

  • Cost:            ££

 

       Web:           http://www.allbeefburgerco.co.uk/

 

  • Stars:           **

Rare Cow

Waltham Abbey, Hertfordshire

  • Purpose:     Post Dance Protein

  • Good for:    Steaks

  • Verdict:       Steak restaurant more than burger joint, but had a burger so..... Nice meat, coarse grind Long Horn, possibly too big a patty without the caramelisation which a great burger needs. Bun a bit soft but almost made it to the end of the meat before gthrowing in the towel. A couple of draught beers and a reasonable wine list. Quite expensive, but set up as a upmarket and nice service so feels it in a good way.

  • Burger:        Big like the cow it came from..

  • Cost:            ££££

 

       Web:           http://www.rarecow.co.uk

 

  • Stars:           **

Psychic Burger

The Old Queen's Head, Islington

  • Purpose:     Burger Assessment

  • Good for:    General Weirdness

  • Verdict:       Good burger, crisp fries, nice range of beers - what's not to like. Except perhaps a dipped bun (brioche, OK) and the provision of one napkin, what's that about? As a previous customer had asked for more napkins, I'm doubting the psychic nature of the staff. On the whole a small but good variety of hand held eatings. Definitely a success.

  • Burger:        Wet.

  • Cost:            ££

 

       Web:           http://psychicburger.com/

 

  • Stars:           ****

Meat Market

Above The Tat Stalls, Covent Garden*

  • Purpose:     Burger Assessment

  • Good for:    Being Better Than Meat Liquor

  • Verdict:       Remaining popular for a reason, the burgers here and Meat Liquor are top of the pile as far as the dirty burger chains go - nice tasting but no char, they're well put together and have the burgers with the regulation house sauce amongst the nice collection of flavours. More than reasonable portions of sides to go with, and a slightly increased menu of beers including hard shakes (as yet untried, but on the list). Still noisy and dark, but better than the Dark Hole Of Calcutta that is Meat Liquor. Yes, I'm  nearly 50. 

  • Burger:        Top.

  • Cost:            £££

 

       Web:           http://www.themeatmarket.co.uk/

 

  • Stars:           ****

 

* for want of a better description, purveyors of fine flags and fabrics doesn't seem quite right

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