Apple's Burger Blog
I love burgers. This is a record of my burger eats for posterity, for when I inevitably die of burger related disease and/or obesity. Enjoy Apple's burger reviews, enjoy burgers more (responsibly of course)
Let this be a tasty warning. Enjoy !
p.s. View on Chrome, Edge formatting is rubbish
Kua Aina
Goodge Street
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Purpose: Burger Assessment
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Good for: Being ignored.
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Verdict: I would say inoffensive, but actually the chunk of onion on top of the cheese was a bit much - tasted OK if you don't mind a mouthful of semi-cooked onion in your burger - it certainly didn't do anything for the overall taste. Meat was quite rare, and this didn't help either as the outer char from what should have been a "lava coals" grill didn't add anything to the meat flavour. Bun was a bit fall apart as well, so fairly disappointing really. Skin on chips were average, and although I quite like the Kona beers, they're a bit pricy. Repetiously, the service was probably worse than the seventies - sat, ignored, ordered, waited, asked for sauce, didn't arrive, ate, was ignored some more, asked for bill, didn't arrive, asked again, left. Put off going to Hawaii.
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Burger: Probably what they tasted like in the 70's as advertised.
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Cost: £££
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Stars: *
Burgista Bros
Ealing
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Purpose: Post-Warrington game recovery
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Good for: Almost healthy brunch
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Verdict: Advertising as extraordinary gourmet is always going to be a tough ask, and so it proved. Generally a good burger, reasonable brioche if a little sweet, good amount of salad, three cheese options and a decent patty only marred by too much cheap tasting mayonnaise which was a bit of a let down. Again, fries were OK if not greate, and another place with no alcohol which again isn't necessarily a bad thing, especially after last night. Bottle of juice, or a big bottle of juice, milkshakes of apparently flavoured milk (so not thick and creamer) and free refill soft drinks.
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Burger: Not extraordinary
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Cost: ££
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Web: www.burgista.co.uk
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Stars: ***
London Burger Company
Muswell Hill
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Purpose: Post-cinema burger stop
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Good for: Practicing crying ahead of another 2 point loss to a massive Super League side
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Verdict: Even if I hadn't used all my emotion watching Goodbye Christopher Robin, I wouldn't have been crying with joy, but it was very pleasing to find such a nice burger. The image is terrible, sorry about that, and doesn't do it justice. Brioche-like bun (not sweet or heavy but good texture), tasty cheddar, and a nice if not flame grilled patty worked nicely. Fries very very good, no alcohol but a possibly unofficial BYO policy in operation.
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Burger: Surprisingly nice.
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Cost: ££
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Stars: ****
Flat Top Burgers
The Block, Shoreditch
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Purpose: Burger assessment
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Good for: Urban decay
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Verdict: Not a particularly salubrious street food outpost on a cold Tuesday night - but better than the Urban Food Fest up the road which is a car park for the winter. It is in fact a car park, so maybe that should be "it's a food market in the summer". Either way, I was happily impressed by the food and drink available. It wasn't overly tasty, as in big flavour, but very pleasant and the overall feeling is of nice meat with a bit of crust in a nice soft bun with low impact (i.e. not particularly flavoursome) cheese, nice sauce, and very nice pickles adding a good piquancy. Add apparently rosemary fries, maybe not overpoweringly herby but good and crispy, and a couple of fine beers, and you'ev found a little piece of goodness.
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Burger: Subtle
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Cost: ££
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Stars: ****
Bad Egg
Moorgate
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Purpose: Burger assessment
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Good for: Cheese overload
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Verdict: A nice patty, good char flavour, medium rare with good flavour in a solid brioche type bun, good saucing with onion and pcikle totally overwhelmed by the cheese fondue. Cheese itself was quite nice on it's own, but when slathered over an otherwise pretty good burger it's a waste of both. Makes a change from not being able to taste the cheese, but hey, why ruin two good somethings? Fries ordinary at best, saved by a very good beer selection.
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Burger: Swamped
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Cost: ££
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Stars: **
The Art Town
Enfield Town
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Purpose: Testing bold statements
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Good for: Musical stuff probably
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Verdict: Having passed a sign advertising the best burger in Enfield, the UK or the Universe - or similar proud but inaccurate boast - on many occasions, it had to be tested. And it was found wanting. Looked OK actually, the bun was distinctive, cheese poking out over the patty and the usual salad. Taste let it down - the bun was fine, but the cheese had no presence and the meat patty was industrial. I didn't get anything special about the sauce, and overall it could have been any café/pub offering. Chips were soggy, so that wasn't a bonus. Café selection of bottled beers and wine which was fine.
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Burger: Not the best in Enfield.
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Cost: ££
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Stars: **
Rox Burgers
Spitalfields
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Purpose: Burger Assessment
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Good for: Peace and quiet
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Verdict: Not necessarily good, peace and quiet, albeit a Tuesday night - I hope this is not a normal state of affairs, but suspect it may be given the slightly off the beaten location. Hopefully the studenty nature of the area will mean business. Having done their marketing for them I should say the burger was pretty good - no salad on the base Cheeseburger didn't hurt, the meat was nicely crusted on the outside and pink in the middle with a pleasing not greasy and equally not dense or coarse texture. The bun might have been a little sweet, and the cheese a little nodescript, but they didn't hurt - what took away a star was the mayo which swamped the overall burger flavour a tad. Crispy fries, skin on but thin, were OK alternating between crispy & tasty and grainy. A couple of local bottled beers and a couple of normal ones, plus wine were the drinks options - XX IPA is better.
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Burger: Deserves saving.
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Cost: ££
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Stars: ***
Home Burger
Holloway Road
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Purpose: Burger Assessment
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Good for: Delivery
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Verdict: I like a bit of the good, the bad and the irritating, so a good place to go. Irritation first, minor though it is, if you're advertised as open (cunningly not on your own website), be open. The bad, fries (more chips), although OK are more or less cold from sitting in the warming area, mainly due to being prepped for delivery. The good is very good, a delicious burger - worth the rest. A nicely cooked patty of bitey crust and pink inside within a good brioche bun with nice slice of tomato, lettuce and house sauce. Cheese was really good, strong enough to have an obvious Cheddary hit on the edges, but adding a nice note to the overall burger taste in the middle. Didn't see the American Cheese, and obviously didn't taste it. Didn't matter. Both the Lamb (quirky) and the Horatia (opposite) were good to while away an hour.
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Burger: Not at all homely, which is good.
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Cost: ££
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Stars: ****
Mac & Wild
Devonshire Square, London
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Purpose: Burger Assessment
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Good for: Venison
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Verdict: Looks good doesn't it? Two patties, one beef one venison, caramelised onion, bearnaise sauce, cheese, what's not to like. Unfortunately there was a bitter taste that affected the overall flavour pretty negatively - I couldn't work out whether it was the sauce or the onions, but it was a shame. The bun held together well, the cheese wasn't apparent but looked nice, and the double meat gave a good taste and burger texture. The fries were good and a reasonable portion, and there was a reasonably good selection of beers and wine. Decent surroundings and the staff were very good. Better than expected apart from the obvious.
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Burger: Give it a go.
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Cost: £££
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Web: https://www.macandwild.com/fitzrovia-menus/devonshire-square-menus
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Stars: ***
https://www.macandwild.com/fitzrovia-menus/devonshire-square-menus
Cut & Grind
Devonshire Square, London
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Purpose: Burger Assessment
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Good for: Dieting
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Verdict: What a hideous disappointment. Firstly the burger, which was bland and without texture, unless you ate the bits which were charred which gave it bite and a good taste. Other than that the only texture was the pickle, which is a shame as it looks really nice, and the odd bite showed off a good meaty taste allied with a fine cheddar flavour - trouble is, most of it wasn't like that, no real taste at all other than the sauce. Not at all greasy, which was good, and leads me to suspect we got the "skinny" option (we weren't asked), maybe the "juicy" option would have been better. I was waiting for the bun to disintegrate to add to the disappointment but it surprised me and held together. The chips were actively distasteful, triple cooked sogginess is not a great taste. Expensive beer to add to the dissatisfaction. Apparently 2018 National Burger Awards winner. Not sure how.
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Burger: Sloppy.
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Cost: £££
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Stars: *
https://www.macandwild.com/fitzrovia-menus/devonshire-square-menus
Beer And Burgers
11-13 Parr Street, Liverpool
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Purpose: Burger Assessment
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Good for: Beer
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Verdict: Does what it says on the tin, loads of beers - although I cheated and had cider - and sells burgers. All good so far, especially the beers - it's worth going just for them. Also good were the fries, although too salty for my liking, that may not be representative. A good shot at chopped meat type patties (2 in a normal Cheeseburger, so I guess 4 in a double - I know, maths has always been a strong point, except quadratic equations), which I don't generally like so much but didn't mind here, especially the crusty edges although they were also salty. The bun was fine without being great, sauce was saucy without being really tasty, and the best flavour was probably the pickles. Crying out for some salad really, but if you like Meat Liquor/Dirty Burger type burgers you'll probably like these (although maybe not as much). Monthly specials look enticing though. Given 3 stars, I was tempted for 2, but that would be harsh.
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Burger: Not as good as the beer.
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Cost: £££
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Stars: ***
https://www.macandwild.com/fitzrovia-menus/devonshire-square-menus
Stax Diner
1.7 Kingly Ct, Soho, London W1B 5PW
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Purpose: Burger Assessment
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Good for: Similarity to Meat Liquor
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Verdict: Quite a good looking burger package hiding a couple of deficiencies would be the tagline. Burgers are double patty, hence "Stax" I guess - in a good brioche bun which holds the meat and the sauce to the end. Sauce was nice, american cheese a bit bland, but on the whole quite nice - bit like a larger Dead Hippie, which led to the Meat Liquor comment. The deficiencies are around the patties, which were coarse and packed which isn't my favourite texture, but did lead to a good look of crust on the outside with a pink middle, but also had some gristly bits which I wasn't impressed with. Good crisp fries added, and a small selection of beers rounded it off. On the whole, not bad. Staff deserve a mention too - friendly and efficient.
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Burger: A bit generic
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Cost: ££
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Stars: ***
https://www.macandwild.com/fitzrovia-menus/devonshire-square-menus
Ruby Jean's (At the Phoenix Pub)
37 Cavendish Square, London, Greater London, W1G 0PP
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Purpose: Burger Assessment
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Good for: Keeping pubs open
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Verdict: I don't normally review pub burgers, mainly because they are unremittingly terrible, and this is a case in point. Being in the area (Blood Donation - do it, save lives, and organ donation if you haven't signed up (but not for burger creation purposes)), and interested by "Ruby Jean", I gave it a go. In essence, industrial tasting burger with what appeared to be fake char in an overly salty way, swamping everything in a bun with a soggy bottom. Not good. The crisp fries would have helped, but they had a floury artificial edge possibly the reason for the crispness. At least as a pub the drinks were good.
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Burger: Don't.*
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Cost: ££
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Stars: **
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*Go for Major Pepper, swamping the patty in Padron peppers and an admittedly nice pepper sauce is worthwhile.
https://www.macandwild.com/fitzrovia-menus/devonshire-square-menus